Relationships have bumps. It’s entirely normal for a long-term relationship to feel stale or boring every now and then. If you and your partner love each other, and there’s no abuse in the relationship, there are ways to spice things up and remind each other why you’re there. If your relationship could use a pick-me-up just in time for Valentine’s Day, read on for ways to give your relationship a tune-up.
Physical Wellness
It’s not easy to love someone when you’re not feeling well or suffering from depression. Whether you’re just plain tired at the end of the day or experiencing sexual dysfunction, that can’t help a relationship either. The first step in making your relationship work better is to be sure that the limited time you and your partner have together is quality time. This means addressing your medical and mental health needs immediately and putting them as a priority.
Grab a sheet of paper, and write down a list of things to follow up on. From the price of Cialis to whether or not your doctor thinks you need Viagra, you’ll want to write down a complete list of your medications and their generic versions. Consider seeking medical advice if you think a medicine on your list isn’t working, and do what you can to catch up on those missed appointments. While you’re on the phone with your pharmacy or doctor’s office, don’t forget to pick up that birth control prescription either.
Erectile dysfunction, low libido, side effects from seizure medications, and more can all impact your relationship without you even realizing it. If medication costs are a problem, ask your pharmacist about GoodRX or coupons that will mean lower prices.
Feeling Sexy
With your mental and physical wellness taken care of, you’re already in better shape to make your relationship a top priority. Go online to find that final sale on girlfriend jeans, boyfriend jeans, or that perfect fit new demi bra. In feeling sexier, you’re bound to get your partner’s attention.
Maybe you’ve been wondering why your girlfriend doesn’t come on to you lately. Look in the mirror. Have you taken her attraction to you for granted? Are you still wearing that cologne she loves? Maybe you can’t understand why he doesn’t kiss you at bedtime anymore. Be honest: are you going to bed in sweatpants and with your hair in a bun?
While long term relationships have the advantage of being comfortable, it’s in these comfort zones that we can fall into the trap of taking our partners for granted. If this might be the case for you, you can easily fix it by paying more attention to the vibe you’re giving off. From a new outfit to doing your hair and some make-up, you might just see change quickly if you’re willing to go for it.
Couple’s Therapy and the Shared Dream
If things are really rough, consider couple’s counseling. There, you’ll learn about the shared dream. A licensed therapist can help you to reconnect and remind yourself why you’re in your relationship, to begin with. There’s nothing wrong with asking for help, and it’s a therapist’s goal to do what they can to help get you back on track. Don’t hesitate to reach out if you both want it and need extra help.
In the end, love is a noun, but any good couple’s therapist would argue that it’s a verb too. Love is a choice. If you and your partner want your relationship to work, the best way to go about it is to view the word as a verb. Every day, ask yourself how you can make your partner smile or what you could do to make their day a little easier. Encourage them to do the same. If you’re both actively doing your best to love and cherish one another, improvements and change will come quickly.
From taking care of your physical and mental health to dressing up for one another to keep those sparks flying in the bedroom, keeping in mind that shared dream and why you love each other won’t hurt to improve your relationship either.